I lost two dear friends last month.  They were friends from another chapter in my life, when I lived and worked in New York more than a decade ago.  They were boon companions to so many adventures, and I truly loved them.  Both died of cancer in the lungs, and spent their final days in the same hospice in the Bronx.  I only learned of their terminal diagnoses within a few of weeks of their deaths.  It is still unbelievable to me that they are gone. I am more or less at a loss for words about this.  I cannot look at my day to day life the same way right now, and perhaps I shouldn’t and won’t ever again.  I have always believed strongly in E.M. Forster’s credo – “Only connect.”  We did connect, and now that connection is undone.  Or maybe it isn’t.  I don’t know for sure. What I do know is that I’m looking for comfort.  An older version of the funeral rite in the Book of Common Prayer talks about the “comfortable words.”  Aside from faith and/or belief in an afterlife, I am seeking deeply comforting experiences right now.

SFGC’s oldest girls had the opportunity to perform on the radio program From the Top last week.  The program showcases exceptional young classical musicians from around the country.  One young performer  spoke about how he had lost his father at an early age, how music had been a great solace to him, and how his loss had deepened his commitment to playing the violin.

Music is much more powerful than words, I think.  So instead of “comfortable words,” I too am seeking solace in music.  At our final season concerts last weekend, the girls sang “Balm in Gilead” while members of ODC/Dance company performed with them.  The power and beauty of this song, as sung and danced last weekend, will remain with me forever.  It was a kind of benediction to my grief, and offered healing that no words alone could have done.